please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Randomize
