Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize