my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
