Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
did i walk over a car last night?
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
