thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
