try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
