I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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