i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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