That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
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