But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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