Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
