is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
