your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
