Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize