so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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