We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
