question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
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