Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
