making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize
