Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
