Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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