This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
