Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
