spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize