What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
