So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
