Got a toothbrush?
Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize