She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
