careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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