Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Randomize