I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
