what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
