North Korea, Best Korea!
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Randomize
