I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Found your dick twin last night
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Found the puke drawer
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
