Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
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