um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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