Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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