No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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