If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
