I'm really into asian looking animals
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
