So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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