Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Randomize