but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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