naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
