Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
