Fuck appropriateness.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Randomize
