So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Randomize
