I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
id be glad to
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize