I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
