The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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