would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
